Purposefully Not Making Friends

Found this via Iyov's blog. It's a collection of reality show participants saying the words, "I'm not here to make friends."

Concatenated like that, this video makes reality TV seem heartless.

Personally, I've always found how we relate to each other in sport and gaming in the light of our faith fascinating. I have my own views, but I'd like to hear yours.

So then, as Christians where do we draw the line between competitiveness and friendliness in games? Can a Christian participate in a reality TV show and take this line of thinking?

Other thoughts?

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Comments (13)

Part of being wise and gentle at the same time is knowing how to achieve an end, win a game, complete a project, or meet a goal without alienating those around us. Ultimately whatever activity we happen to pursue it is the souls of those around us which are of eternal consequence. If somehow with that attitude showed up on one of these shows someone might see Christ.
Maybe they should make a reality show called "I'm Here To Make Friends" - that would be pretty interesting. Anyone else agree?
Wow, these folks really put the "ends" in "friends"!
Solshine, I agree : ) Also, how about a "Name That Tune - You've Got a Friend Special Edition," or better, a Jeopardy (Semper Verum I Jeopardarium) category: Songs with the word "Friend" in the title?
First, I can't imagine wanting to go on to any of those reality shows in the first place. But, that bring said, there isn't anything wrong with bring competitive and Christian. I think what needs to happen is that I would have to focus on what is really important, winning or sharing Christ.
I believe that if you have Christ as the focus you can be competitive without being manipulative or rude or and other wrong attitude for life.
In fact, I can imagine being able to have better focus because you are not worried about the other person and their tasks. All you have to do is your best. Everything else would fall into place.
For someone to even make the statement that they are not there to make friends shows you already where their mind is at.
It would be a sad day for a Christian to be saying that on national TV.
The video conglomerate, is simply (mainstream) appropriate - "sheep mentality". In other words an in situ "pop-phrase." The source being vacuous, why try to extract meaning? This is the (world's) attempt to "Speak the truth (in love?)" - Eph 4:15. A divergent parallel! :o)
Outside of a "life in Christ" - spiritual rebirth supplying the necessary (spiritual) genetic traits for Christ likeness, we cannot "speak the truth in love," or indeed live the life of a CHRISTIAN (competing in sports).
Jesus however "LIVED the truth (in love)." A look at his life reveals that he is the only one can actually say, with a POSITIVE spin. "I'm not here to make friends," while he "spoke the truth in love" to pharisees, scribes, the woman caught in the act of adultery...Peter....me.
Sometimes the truth - hurts, BUT given sincere motives & a "loving" heart. It surely amounts to "constructive criticism." Something that video reel, decidedly was not!
I think it's tragic that they can't "compete" and still at least try to make friends. However having wasted a total of about 10mins glimpsing advertisments about these types of shows on TV, I'm certain none of these people have any value as friends. All I've seen are obnoxious, arrogant, backstabbing, so & so's. Pass. Anyway I really can't see why any self respecting person christian or otherwise would want to watch, much less go on, that type of show.
I've got better things to do with my life like flossing the dog or polishing the towball on my car.
No value as friends? Wow. It's nice to know that you haven't written them off before actually meeting them or anything.
You're right, however try studying some body language and listen to their
speech and how they treat each other. It's not rocket science. The whole
purpose of these shows is to generate friction and controversy because it
supposedly makes for ratings. Sorry but as I said, I have better things to
do and people who want to be helped to help. These people are seeking fame
and fortune and acceptance in the wrong place, sadly and they are prepared
to tread on any head that gets in the way.
I'm sorry, ChrisWeller, but I still have to disagree. Don't get me wrong– I understand where you're coming from. Based on what is televised, some of the people on these shows seem like they would be particularly hard to love...but it is them whom we are called to love the hardest.

What is *televised* (very important distinction) is the friction and the controversy, because it does make for ratings. But to assume that these people have no redeeming qualities, or that they are not worthy of our love and attention, seems awfully judgmental.
Christians can participate in reality shows, but they must hold onto the fruits of the Spirit rather than conforming to the world with it's pride and selfishness while competing.
I don't believe that any true Christian can hold the perspective of "not trying to make friends". Jesus, Himself, stressed the importance of relationships in the greatest commandments- "Love the Lord God with all your soul and mind; Love your neighbor as yourself. All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments." (Matt. 22:37-38)
Therefore, in everything that we do, we are to to it as if honoring the Lord through loving and serving others.
There are no exceptions to the rules. Jesus Christ, our Lord and Savior, said it Himself, so how can you argue with that?
Good Morning

WoW!!!!! What if god say's i did not come into the world to love anyone or to make friends . I just come to lay down the rules and follow them if you want to get to heaven. Know most of the world doing competition did not come to befriend anyone but with out people who could you compete with surely not your self. So Before you make that statement think about what you are saying because soon as you say that then all eyes are on you. huh!!!!.Would that be christ like i would not want god to show up in me like that.
Can you imagine a Christian going to his pastor and says, "I don't come to church to make friends. I come here to worship God and serve in His ministry."?

It's a very scary thought. Something that I wish is not going on inside the church.
Every single position we're in is an opportunity to walk our talk, and shine into the darkness. As a believer, I may not be in a particular situation to 'make friends' in the typically understood sense of that word. However, to someone who doesn't believe, my extension of a Christian hand to them, and exhibition of love will most certainly be viewed as an open door for friendship. We can't look at the language that a non-believer is using in the context of a game show with a singular goal of worldly riches. From a Christian perspective, we most certainly would be there to 'make friends' as this is exactly how we'd be viewed by someone who's never had the benefit of enjoying the fellowship of a true believer.

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