The Bear’s Season of Grief

For a time, I worked as a line cook for a popular, high-end restaurant. It was hard work, to which I devoted much time, sweat, and even blood, following a nasty run-in with a very sharp mandolin. But the demands of the kitchen were all worth it whenever I peered into the dining room to see that a guest had completely cleaned a plate I’d prepared only minutes before. In that moment, we’d made a personal connection through food. It’s what made the difference between a job and an act of service.

The interplay between food and the human condition is what draws us to Hulu’s The Bear. The series is about what it takes to be not only a chef, but a person, an artist, a teammate, a family member, and a friend. In its debut season, classically trained chef Carmy (Jeremy Allen White) returns home to run his late brother Mikey’s (Jon Bernthal) struggling sandwich shop, The Original Beef, where he’s forced to confront his own personal and family trauma in the wake of Mikey’s death. By Season 2, Carmy has successfully transformed that sandwich shop into a fine-dining restaurant. But during its soft opening, chaos ensues as the crew faces a series of emotional breakdowns under the pressures of rapid growth.

Season 3 picks up in the aftermath of that opening night, as Carmy and the crew figure out how to move past their pain, resentment, anger, and fear. The series continues to reflect what the Bible tells us in Ecclesiastes 3: that there is a time to weep and to laugh, to love and to hate, for war and for peace, that “there is a time for everything, and a season for every activity under the heavens.” For The Bear, this is a season of grief.

Perhaps the most profound example of this is the touching eulogy delivered by pastry chef Marcus (Lionel Boyce) at his mother’s funeral. In it, he acknowledges that she was “nice to everyone,” that she “never let [him] be scared,” and that he found solace in just watching her cook. “I always felt loved,” he says. “It didn’t matter what was going on, or if I was in trouble, or whatever. I knew she was listening.” He wraps with a simple yet beautiful truth: “Having someone actually, really pay attention to you. That was really special.” What Marcus describes is a relationship that many of us seek with God, one where we feel protected and loved, seen and never alone.

At the funeral, attendees receive a card bearing the Bible verse Revelation 21:4: “He will wipe every tear from their eyes. There will be no more death, or mourning or crying or pain, for the old order of things has passed away.” This passage is commonly read as a prophecy of Jesus’ return and the coming of the kingdom of God. But what do we do about our grief in the meantime. How are we to experience God’s love today?

The Bear suggests that we may do so through small acts of kindness. Throughout this season of grief, we see characters quietly reaching out to, and for, one another—whether through a friendly conversation or a moment of moral support. It’s through food, however, that we truly see God at work.

The season’s sixth episode, “Napkins,” is an extended flashback revealing how line cook Tina (Liza Colón-Zayas) comes to work at the restaurant. Hit with a large rent increase just before she’s laid off from her job of 15 years, the 46-year-old Tina enters a younger, tech-savvy workforce seeking applicants with degrees that she doesn’t have. The constant rejection wears on her as she fears for her family’s financial future. When she pops into The Original Beef for a cup of coffee, she’s gifted with both the coffee and a sandwich, on the house. The first bite moves her to tears, which invites none other than perpetually stressed Mikey to commiserate with her, airing his own grievances about restaurant ownership.

But despite all the problems, Mikey likes his work.“If you consider the special moments of your life,” he tells her, “like celebrations, good times, you know, cheer . . . they always happen around food.” This encounter proves to be one of those special moments, as Tina needs a job and Mikey needs a new cook. Tina’s life is forever changed, all because of a small act of kindness and the opportunity to break bread.

As people of faith, we must do more than simply wait for God’s kingdom to arrive. It abdicates our responsibility to help bring about that kingdom—and, in turn, our responsibility to one another. Imagine what would be possible if we were to concern ourselves actively with the grief of others; indeed, to make it our business to alleviate that grief. The Bear demonstrates that to be a chef is to do just that. “We cook to nurture people,” says Thomas Keller, one of the real-life chefs who appear as themselves in this season. “You’re nurturing yourself. You’re nurturing the team. . . . You’re gonna be nurturing our guests. We’re even nurturing our farms, our fishermen, our foragers, our gardeners, who are bringing us all these wonderful ingredients.” Cooking a single meal may have an impact that reaches far beyond the guest to whom it's served.

Like a good meal, the kingdom of God takes prep, cooperation, and dedication to service. And so beyond a prophecy, Revelation 21:4 may also point to how God works through us now to establish a model for what’s to come. If the arrival of God’s kingdom is meant to wipe away tears and put an end to “mourning or crying or pain,” then we must consider how we may do our part today to bring about that vision. Like Marcus’ mom, we can show others that they are loved and seen and heard, no matter the trouble; that they are protected because we have made them more of a priority than ourselves; and that they need not feel alone because we are actually paying attention to them and their needs. Like her—like Marcus, Tina, and the rest of the crew—we can help transform our world and each other. When we make service our ministry, we model the way of Jesus’ hospitality here on Earth, readying ourselves for the banquet God has prepared for us all.

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At Think Christian, we encourage careful cultural discernment. We recognize and respect that many Christians choose not to engage with pop culture that contains particular content, such as abuse, sex, violence, alcohol or drug use, or that employs the use of coarse language. To that end, we suggest visiting Common Sense Media for detailed information regarding the content of the particular pieces of pop culture discussed in this article.